It's almost June. Less than three months and counting until I move to Mobile.
I alternate between wanting to be in Mobile-yesterday and wanting to put it off indefinitely. It's pretty much been this way since March/April.
I've met some amazing people in the last nine months, but
It seems impossible for me to stay still. My restlessness has only gotten worse in the last twelve months, as I'm sure I've mentioned more than once already. Because of this inclination, I think I have become a more unreliable (or less dependable) person. This may explain why I have met so many amazing people, but to some extent either I have held them or been held by them at a distance. Perhaps these people are just as restless as I am and in as much a period of transition as I am and so we are all holding the world at a distance. Maybe I only wish it is so because I hope there are other people craving and fearing emotional intimacy, as I am. I envy those who can fall back on consistency. I miss being around people who know me and who I know but we are all so scattered now.
As some of you may know, in the last month or so, I had to make an emergency family trip to
While I was in
I have a few trips coming up before I move to
Then in August, or perhaps also in July, I will probably be making a trip to
I am incredibly excited about my move to
And getting to see Adam and Toni and Brannon and Eric again will be so great. I haven't been back to
The future is still pretty murky right now and I'm not sure when it will clear. The unknowns in this equation definitely outweigh the knowns. I am staying as optimistic as I can be, knowing that when it doubt, books and hermitage are still fairly appealing to me.